Act of Vengeance.

Dear Jessica,

I was adequitely confused by your birthday party flyer. Thanks for sending it to me, but, remember, I'm in the future. I can't go back in time. I thought you were smarter, man. And now I'm bummed cause I'm missing a party. I NEVER MISS A KILLER PARTY.

And yeah, Jon Hamm and I bro'd down on the set of Stood Still Earth..or When Stills Earth... Earth Daze... - whatever movie I did with him. Dude, it's been two years, I can't remember them all. He's awesome. Like, real, you know? And he wasn't lying when he said I have the WHOLE package - it's big, if you know what I mean. You know what I mean?

Anyway, so, is he coming to your party? Since you were all talking about hanging out with him in October, I figured he could at least make an appearance. I mean, I would, if I could...but I can't, so I won't...that's a song, right?

So, I'm not going to say Happy Birthday because it's not your birthday, but - admitted - having your birthday rager in the middle of the week is a pretty stellar party risk. Only the solid people will make that, and that's all you need, dude!



Regards,

Keanu


PS Do you know what I mean?