Monday, April 18, 2011

The wind's feeling real these days.

A few weeks ago, a friend brought to my attention a post by a blogger I don't read; boy did it eerily ring with the echoes of my own recent thoughts:
Every time I sit down to write, I am overcome with disappointment with what this blog has become. It used to be a place that I loved, that I was proud of. Not so much, anymore. I feel completely lost in this sea of New Blogging. I am not a brand, I do not have a "story" to sell. It's just me, writing words, telling you stories about my life, about the family that I love. And I wonder if it's worth writing anymore because of how much things have changed. I doubt myself. I doubt my place here. I doubt the value of the words that I type here and publish for the world to read.
I understand completely, and whereas this blogger decided to try to reinvigorate her blogging again, I cannot do the same. A few years into Tried to Live Forever's inception, I tried getting into the swing of New Blogging - not advertising (never!) - but  due to a certain opportunity. I just couldn't hack it. And as my audience grew, my censorship did as well. A great many things have happened this past year and I've chosen not to share them because I want to keep them to myself and those involved. And sometimes I'd want to write about them and would draw back because I would begin to guess the popularity (or unpopularity) of the post, and that, my friends, wasn't the point of this place when I started it.

The point? I used this space to have a place for casual writing, but writing to keep me writing somewhere. I wasn't doing it in my job, and after four years studying and writing journalism, I needed to keep the pace. However, last year's NaNoWriMo finally proved to myself that I can write more seriously if I put my mind to it. And after having written more seriously, and now in the stages of editing, my writing quota is going pretty well without blogging too often.

All this said, I'm not giving up on my "internet life." I'll continue posting the briefer updates as I always have on my tumblr and my twitter. Perhaps one day I'll open up a long-form blog again; but for now I don't have the time or drive to keep one up. And so, this will be my last post here.

I do have to thank you all for reading. Sincerely. It started as a place just for my own benefit, but ultimately it was you who I thought of when I wrote. And I found some amazing blogs (which I continue to read!) and even friends through this little spot on the internet. Thank you for reading, and thanks for being wonderful and mostly, positive. You're the best!



  1. I feel the very same way. That excerpt defines my thoughts on the subject perfect.

    It was fun while it lasted, I suppose.


  2. I know exactly how you feel. That being said, I wish you all the luck and the best in things. Glad to hear that you'll still be on the other sites. Thank you for this piece of the internet for as long as it has been. <3

  3. Sad to see you post less, but I COMPLETELY understand. And I'm really, really glad to hear that you'll keep writing. xoxox

  4. Hope you'll start up again someday <3 <3

  5. Oh I am sad to see you go!
    Wishing you all the best,
    Hillary xoxo

  6. I remember sharing Y's post on reader because I felt the same. So I completely understand you on this. I'm glad we got to meet through this blog and I'll most definitely keep up with you on Twitter and Tumblr. Hopefully in person again soon too :)

  7. I miss your blog. I don't have tumblr or twitter so I won't be seeing you there, but that being said, I completely understand. I hope all is well in your world. Take care.

  8. Liz - we are of the same blogging outlook/generation for sure. That's why we became such good friends :)

    Jen - thanks! I think you were one of my first commenters ;)

    Zan - you get all the juicy updates on my life via after-work drinks anyway!

    Sarah - maybe one day if I ever get the time to focus on it again!

    Hillary - Thanks, girl!

    Jamie - Yep, that was kind of the catalyst for this when you shared it. I will see you next time I'm in Chicago or next time you're in NY FOR SURE girl!!!

    Lyndsey - you see my Twitter updates on Facebook :) See you there :)

  9. I can feel the change in blogging within the past two years. I love your blog but I've always said the day I start writing for everyone else and not myself that's when I stop. I'm glad you're doing what's best for you.

  10. Good luck to you. I understand what you mean. And I've suffered from it to. I am going to try to get back to MY blog... the way that *I* want it to be. Screw this new blogging! xoxo

  11. I'm sorry to hear this hon. Your blog has always been one of my favourites. And if it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have found Dragonette, or thought of buying Amanda Leigh. :)

    At the same time, I barely even post myself anymore. I'm hoping it is just a slump. My blogging history, however, shows I post more when I am unhappy. If I am not posting as much because I AM happy, then I'm going to take that as a good sign anyway, I guess!

  12. I just read this and I understand, the same thing happened to me. Then I started all these new blogs, but I totally get it. Its like I got it all out and now I move on.

  13. I'm going to miss your adventures! ...I've done the same thing, more censorship...and boy, do I wish I could write on my blog just to keep my writing somewhere. See you on Twitter! @SheSellsFWTX

  14. Awww sorry to hear that you are done here. I myself took a huge hiatus (just returned), but I definitely understand. It's not something that lasts forever.

    Good luck!!


  15. Aw, I guess I'm a bit late- ha, I just came across your blog. I agree with your decision and best wishes for the future!