Cause your words don't translate.

On Monday, I had the full intention of taking to my blog about my weekend and what I thought about the movies He's Just Not That Into You and Fanboys. I planned on talking about my burgeoning domesticity and "apartment projects" like getting shelves for kitchen cabinets and cleaning out the closet. I was prepared to articulate the ways in which Jesse busies himself with new power tools and wood.

Unfortunately, I've been busy!

So, that's your summary of my weekend. Except to say that last night over a beer, I was talking with two ladies who hadn't seen the piece of turd that is He's Just Not... and apparently I have too many words to say about a movie that shouldn't really matter that much. I'm going to be short: Kells, Erica, Gaby and I went to see it on Friday night, and in a packed theater of 99% women - most of whom were completely engrossed and related to every inanity of the sweeping caricatures of the females in the film. The four of us left the theater and looked at each other and were like, "So..." and somebody (I can't recall who) goes, "LAME!" And we all agreed and started talking about how we were slightly offended as women and overtly offended that such a poorly-edited, crappily-written movie would manage a green-light. Seriously. And, one more thing about the editing: nearly every scene was about a minute and thirty seconds tops, with storylines juxtaposed from something entirely depressing (like death) to a party scene with flirting - it was jarring. Don't even get me started on the prettily tied-up ending. The good thing was that we all were like, "I'm so glad you all are my friends." We were all on the same page - which seemed to be a very, very different one from some of the women sitting around us in the theater. A whole different book, if you will.

Also, Scarlett Johanssen is one of the most awful actresses in the business.

Okay, I think I'm done. Apologies. I'm just writing what I'm thinking at this point. That said, Fanboys is a budget movie about Star Wars geeks, and while totally, totally cheesy and bad, it was surprisingly enjoyable, if only for the references, the cameos, and the fact that the producer, Kevin Spacey, got the cast on the actual Skywalker Ranch to film part of the movie. I would go looking for Spacey's amazing Star Wars Lost Auditions skit from SNL in the 90s on YouTube, but I'm at work. Perhaps I'll remember later - because they're golden.

ANYWAY!

Last night I saw Lily Allen and was quite underwhelmed by the whole business. The band played to backing tracks, which made the songs quite boring. I thought, I've heard this. On your album. On my iPod. The new songs haven't quite been made into riveting live diddies (diddies? ditties? whatever...), mainly because not many people knew the songs nor are they as energy-driven and bombastic as Alright, Still. Of course, it WAS a free show in a small venue - hopefully this just amounts to poor planning and execution as a one-off, and she'll be back in April at Roseland in full force. Still love her, and she looked adorbs. Also, Amazon has her new album on sale for 3.99 now - get it!

After the show, Jesse and I went to Trainwreck to see...everyone. We had some fun dancing and seeing all those lovely faces. I think the best part of that party is the secrets; it's like Vegas but not as gross. Okay, sometimes it can be as gross. I don't know what I'm saying. Just, that's it's fun and there's usually something gossip-worthy going down. It cracks me up to sit back and watch it. And when I don't go, Erica has the best stories. Ha!

In lieu of having no pictures of last night at the moment - Jesse got a lomography camera so he has to get those developed, and Jiscilla hasn't posted hers yet - I bring you two of Katie Brown's polaroids from Perry's Mad Men birthday party a few weeks ago: