That summer they took us in.

Here are the remarkable things that have happened in the past month --

I should start with a true point of unending happiness: my brother proposed to his girlfriend who shall henceforth be called his fiancé! He had wanted to surround Katie with the beauty of New Hampshire, at the summit of a mountain, and profess how his love was more vast than their view (at least, this is what comes to mind when he said "yeah, I'm going to take her hiking..."). Instead, as the gods are wont to do, it rained heavily all weekend and he was left to take on the task in a dimly lit, romantic restaurant, on one knee like a true charmer. I mean, I know what that's like! I'm thrilled at the prospect of having a sister! And for all the happiness she brings to my brother, yadda, yadda, yadda...

Before my brother's magical weekend, my own romantic hero took me across the United States to visit his family in northern California. It's not a part of the country I've spent much time, and it was great to reconnect with his father and aunt, and to meet his grandmother for the first time. We spent the last day of the trip in San Francisco, a city that renders me in a state of perpetual coldness. There was no fog this time around, like there was that July many years ago, but the wind was still there and it ran through me and chilled my bones every chance it could. I was glad to say bye to the city, but was sad to leave the loving faces of family just north of it.

Amidst the past month Jesse and I also spent a weekend in Massachusetts with my family for Mother's Day. It was a jam-packed weekend that included Katie (before she was The Fiancé) graduating with a Masters Degree (while Jesse and I parked it in a barcalounger-full theater for The Great Gatsby), and a dinner with her entire family. (They who will soon be an extension of our own family!) They are wonderful and again, I'm so happy for my baby brother. We spent Mother's Day on my parents' deck and Jesse got to show off his bocce skills again. He's quite the impressive chap when it comes to competitive games. We were sad to say bye to my family at the end of the weekend.

Last week, after Jesse returned from a couple of weeks of rehearsing in Minneapolis, and I returned from house- and dog-sitting in New Jersey, we celebrated his birthday! I took him out for a delectable steak dinner and then we hung out with friends in the East Village. It was a glorious Monday evening. We squeezed out every bit of time we had since his return and before his departure for the Warped Tour the day before yesterday. On his last night in town we got to see The Menzingers live! And though we felt like The Old People who were checking our watches at 10:30pm, as soon as they hit the stage and the first notes of "The Obituaries" began, we were pumped. (I have to pause here and personally thank Liz for the introduction of them via her blog.) I had a bit of an urge to jump into the crowd and let loose, but I just bounced around in one spot near the back for the most part. Jesse and I (with Pee Wee, of course) collapsed in bed that night exhausted, but it was all time well spent. And now it's gone. I'll see him again soon, and hopefully it will only be a stretch of a couple of weeks.

And in a few minutes, I'm off to Massachusetts again!

Celine & Jesse Forever.

Tomorrow is the first day of May. This means we are 25 days from the release of Before Midnight. The ongoing tale of Celine and Jesse is one of my favorite fictional stories, probably because unlike romantic comedies and most romance depicted onscreen, these two characters represent something close to real. Their conversations, their chemistry, their body language.

Celine and Jesse first met as young people on a train in Europe, and then they met again nine years later in Paris with much more personal history. And now, after nine more years, we will have another view into their characters' lives. I'm not the only person extremely excited by the prospect, as my friend Amy took it upon herself to create the shirt I'm wearing above on her Society 6 page. Get one for yourself -- no superfan should be without!

I wish I had more movie-themed t-shirts. Not logo or title emblazoned, though. But more like this shirt in which only a small sector of people may immediately understand who it's referring to. If while wearing this shirt somebody smiles in recognition, I will be so happy. It's like going to a Ryan Adams show and being like, "these are my people" (a stranger next to me at his Town Hall show years ago alluded to this before he came on stage, I concurred). Or when, before the show started airing, I saw people on the subway reading A Game of Thrones and I always said something like, "that series is amazing!" in a way that hopefully let them know I was not trying to be a creep. I will start conversations with almost anybody about something I love.

And I LOVE these movies. I mean, last year when Jesse and I went to Paris I plotted out a chronological walking tour of Before Sunset. We started at Shakespeare & Co., went to the zinc bar cafe Le Pur, walked the Promenade, etc. That's how much I love that movie. And I haven't even been to Vienna yet.

Last night Jaime (while rewatching this week's Game of Thrones as I sat in above t-shirt) admitted to me that she'd only seen Before Sunrise, which left me flabbergasted. We're setting up a screening of Before Sunset (which I think is better than the first film) pronto. Do you love Celine and Jesse? Are you excited for Before Midnight? Is there a movie you are somewhat fanatical about because of their characters or another reason? Do share.

In conclusion, now you know what I'll be wearing to the theaters on May 24th.

You're on a different road, I'm in the milky way.

On Tuesday afternoon I was able to leave work early. I'd shot a text to a friend in a fragile state about meeting up, and as so often happens with a friend in need of conversation, she asked that we meet at the nail salon. Over the acetone fumes she divulged her recent hardships, and after the purging and venting of the emotional situation, we were ready for food -- and a drink.

We're classy ladies, though, so it was off to a local eatery where we toasted my French '75 to her Southern Sea. After taking in some good greens (breakups don't always manifest in sugar, but in living well...) we wandered towards a nearby hotel bar with great views of Manhattan. We were joined by a third friend and after the first round, the bartender must have sensed our drama-tinged conversation and offered us a free shot and a free second round. And then we toasted to endings and positive mental attitudes and the future.

Hotel bars are strange. Sometimes I get the impression the clientele is simply out of towners looking for some excitement. Perhaps I just always think of that scene from Out of Sight, the one just prior to the great 'What If?' scene in which Karen Cisco deftly handles some businessmen trying to hit on her. But I digress.

I walked to the subway that night with the wind chilling my face and a big wide smile, because why not?

Last night I spent at home doing some chores and for some reason felt compelled to rewatch Brian De Palma's 1976 horror classic Carrie. I honestly don't know why I did, but I hadn't seen it in over a decade. It was creepier than I remembered, and it holds up so well. Sometimes movies can become such 'icons' or have iconic imagery that that's all that comes to mind. I'd forgotten about the odes to Hitchcock within, the great cinematography, and the still-relevant themes. By movie's end, I may or may not have also been taken by Sissy Spacek's ultra '70s locks. My obsession became somewhat solidified by the fact that I took a shower and then parted by hair down the middle, something I never do.

Below, Carrie White and myself this evening trying to rock the center part. Some strands were obviously fighting it; I have naturally wavy hair. After having short hair for a while, I'm now all about growing my hair as long as possible. Should probably keep up with watching '70s film classics for inspiration.

Carrie and Tommy

This is my attitude face with the lovely Jaime tonight in Brooklyn for an El Sportivo show.

Okay fine, here is my PMA face.

I choose to be happy.

Just so you know, and because I think Jesse would like everyone to know, he DID change his flight and he DID arrive earlier. But only by half an hour because the flight was delayed. I didn't even realize the surprise, which I think mildly disappointed him. It was still nice to see him walk in the door and then get in bed as he told me all about his time away and writing songs and Murakami (he's reading 1Q84). Talking in person is the best, isn't it? It's so beautifully easy. Pee Wee stretched out between us in bed (I think he really missed Jesse) and I fell asleep smiling.

Find light in the beautiful sea.

How does time work, really? Where does it go? It just flutters by and then it's 2013 and it's almost April of 2013 and what happened?

In related news, yes, it seems things have happened. The best thing about this is it just proves again how amazing Motion City Soundtrack fans are. There's always been so much love, and I'm personally grateful for their classy and cool fans. Hurrah! The last month has been a bit weird, but they are all family and supportive of each other no matter the issue at hand. Also, I totally got Christina (Tony's ladyfriend) into Bunheads in our conversations while they were overseas, so I hope Tony enjoys that with his newly found time!

Jesse returns tonight from Minneapolis, at least for a little while... I don't think he even changed his flight to try to surprise/scare me this time! He was out there playing a show and they worked on some new songs--always exciting.

In turn I spent my weekend with my wives. A few years ago, going out on a Friday night after work was no problem. These days I have to strategically plan. Friday is my favorite day of the week, but also the most exhausting. My friends wanted to go to a dance party in Brooklyn that happens only once a month, so I made sure to get in a good nap on Friday night after work because we were to meet up at 11pm. Yeah, I had to nap. Way things go when you have a 9-5 five days in a row. And it worked because I was able to stay out dancing til about four in the morning! I'm exclaiming all this because I seriously feel proud. Like, "yeah! Still got it!" ...I'm not very cool.

The funniest part of the night was that a girl came up to me on the dance floor - during a Rihanna jam, total Diamonds Interruptus - and yells near my ear: "My friend, he wants to talk to you. Is that okay?"

What?

Has there been some sort of regression in the dating scene in the years since I've been in a relationship and married? Did some girl really just come up to me on behalf of her dude friend? REALLY? Has that guy not approached someone since middle school? Does this have something to do with the popularity of online dating? Do guys not want to face rejection in real life only via an OKCupid message? These are not even all of the questions I had at that moment. ANYWAY, I was like, "Are you serious? I can't even see who you are pointing to, but I'm married anyways, so..." She smiled and danced off. Can somebody fill me in or give me some insight into this? Does this type of behavior normal? Is this how dudes are picking up ladies in darkly lit bars these days? In 2013?

The rest of my weekend was decidedly more relaxed and I enjoyed doing some top secret Maid of Honor crafting--something I rarely do--and then spending a morning with the bride-to-be and her mom!  The rest of the time I spent with errands or random activities. Sometimes I find myself walking down the street while Jesse's gone, kind of wandering. If you haven't noticed, I'm a pretty independent person, but when he's gone sometimes I feel aimless. I can always do whatever I want, but it's more fun when he's around and I have someone to come home to and who wants to see me and spend time with me and it's not like something I have to plan. He's there, I'm there and it's nice just to be together and have each other around. I'm being quite ineloquent but that's me trying to explain what happens sometimes when he's gone. Nothing makes you appreciate another person's mere presence when they have to leave for days at a time! And I am truly happy just to be sitting next to him on a couch doing absolutely nothing.

He lands in about an hour. I am excited.

GOOD OL' BARFTIME.

For the first time since he's been in Australia, Jesse and I were able to video chat this evening (his morning)! We spent a good twenty minutes talking and not until after did I realize that it was the 27th of February. Six years ago we had our first date! Hooray! As I head to bed, the thought makes me smile even though he's halfway across the globe.

Also, this was the last screenshot of our conversation. YOU'RE WELCOME.

Thinking sorrow was perfection.

I've just hit the time where it's hardest to be away from Jesse. I'm usually pretty good right after he leaves, but there always comes a lull a few days later and my heart sinks just a little bit. This morning he e-mailed me from Seoul, Korea where he was boarding a flight to Brisbane, Australia. Australia has always been a bit of a black spot for the mechanics of our long-dstance relationship since there is a 15 hour time difference and the internet situation there is usually spotty and at hotels very expensive. I'm attempting to keep positive and have high hopes for better communication this go-round. Yet I still remember the time Jesse walked around for an hour in the oppressive heat of Melbourne trying to find an internet cafe so we could talk.

His time in Japan has been good; I know it's one of his favorite countries, and the internet is plentiful! I'm not sure that word is the right descriptor, but even with the 14 hour time difference we were able to e-mail in my morning while he was finishing up a show and video chat when I got home from work and he was waking up in a hotel. Last night we video chatted twice, it was great! Pee Wee joined lazily the second time as he napped in my lap.

Jesse will be having a great time in Australia playing shows and catching up with old friends. Tonight he's going to a Metallica-hosted BBQ - how strange and fun! I'll busy myself by preparing for my annual Oscar-viewing party and making my Oscar predictions... I mean, I'm not saying I'm jealous of his lifestyle, but maybe I am...just a little?

Me thinking of you thinking of me thinking of you type love.

Programming note: the internet at home has been terribly slow for the past week! I am unable to upload photos right now. Will update when I can. Hopefully these words post...

Earlier this week I was talking to one of my friends who is in a relatively new relationship. Her boyfriend asked her if she ever watched porn, and she responded as I think I probably would have -- why watch skeezy videos when I love swooning to Ewan McGregor singing or George Clooney pulling a fully-clothed woman into a bathtub or Tom Hardy in a cardigan (plus their top notch production value)?

And so, on this Valentine's Day, since I will be spending it with my cat on the couch most likely watching Downton Abbey and Girls (check and check, Project Runway is currently on), here is an ode to some great (sexy) characters...

(I promise to update this with photos when I get a chance!)

>> Mr. Darcy (Colin Firth), Pride & Prejudice (BBC miniseries) - I watch this miniseries at least twice a year and it's like six hours long. That's how much it makes me swoon. I also know the DVD chapters that are 'most important.' (DARCY SCENES)

>> Mr. Darcy (Colin Firth), Bridget Jones's Diary - Obviously. Not only is it one of the best rom-coms ever, but it's basically Colin Firth reprising his P&P role.

>> Jack Foley (George Clooney), Out of Sight - hands down the sexiest movie ever. And there's no nudity or sex! But you just watch that trunk scene! You watch George Clooney pull a (surprisingly great) Jennifer Lopez into a bathtub with him while she's fully clothed! It makes no sense but it's sexy!

>> Christian (Ewan McGregor), Moulin Rouge! - that bright, shining face singing about love makes me swoon so hard.

>> Matt (Mark Ruffalo), 13 Going on 30 - Ruffalo is just so understated dreamy.

>> The Piemaker (Lee Pace), Pushing Daisies - the eager eyebrows do it all.

>> Walter Burns (Cary Grant), His Girl Friday - fast talking, LOVE IT.

>> Forrest Bondurant (Tom Hardy), Lawless - cardigans.

>> Eddie (Hugh Jackman), Someone Like You - I don't think many people have seen this rom-com, but YOWWWW Hugh Jackman in boxers!

>> Laurie (Christian Bale), Little Women - Bale has done many a swoon-worthy movie, but it all goes back to Laurie!

>> Hopsy (Henry Fonda), The Lady Eve - what a lovable buffoon!

>> Robert Downey, Jr in everything - because his charm extends everywhere!

>> Trent (Sam Rockwell), Lawn Dogs - little gem that made me fall for Rockwell.

>> BOTH Jesse and Celine in Before Sunset - because that chemistry! Their conversations; his smile, her accent.

>> Tiffany (Jennifer Lawrence), Silver Linings Playbook - I think I fell in love with her during the movie.

I could probably keep going...but I should STOP! Do you have any swoon-worthy characters you turn to when you need a romantic boost?

And if you need an injection of emotion tonight, here is a great and VERY SHORT but entirely AMAZING short story by Mary Robison called "Yours." It's wonderful, I promise.

I do miss Jesse. He is in Minneapolis and heads overseas tomorrow. We don't make much of a to-do about Valentine's Day, and he's usually traveling anyway. I'll tell you this much - he makes me feel loved and special most days of the year. I feel lucky and grateful every day... all those characters above are just characters, I got the real thing. Smiles! Happiness! Hooray!

And, finally, my Valentine's Day tradition, re-sharing Kelly's Christmas card from 2004 with you. Happy Valen-Mimes Day!

Last weekend.

The time has come again. Jesse has been home for a good two months, and tomorrow he leaves for a whole one. It's probably the reason I've been slacking on updating -- spending my downtime with Jesse was priority the past couple of weeks. (And updating will most likely take up as a distraction upon his departure.)

It's been some time since he was out of the country on tour, and we've haven't been apart for an entire month since the very beginning of our relationship. In fact, the beginning of our relationship started February 27th, 2007 -- a six-year anniversary coming up! He will be in Sydney, Australia that day. But I don't dwell on these things; it's corny but we do have the rest of time to hang out... which he takes care to remind me of every now and then.

We spent his last weekend in town like real hardcore cool people by going to a backgammon meet-up. Yeah, you read me right. Jesse loves the game backgammon, and while I find it frustrating to play him because he is simply streets ahead of me in the game, I like it too. Jesse heard about a meet-up at SPiN, the Susan Sarandon-owned ping-pong bar in Manhattan. Backgammon aficianado Jaime also joined us and we descended into the back room a bit nervous for what type of crowd backgammon brings around. Turns out it wasn't only octogenarians, but a pretty diverse crowd of young, old, foreign, etc.

Jaime remarked at one point, "dang, if I was single I would totally come here to pick up guys." You heard it, ladies: BACKGAMMMON MEET-UPS! Better start learning the game!

On Sunday, Jesse and I had a double date brunch with Kells and Jon, to La Palapa where brunch is $15 for a coffee, a delicious margarita, and the best huevos rancheros I've ever eaten. It's our favorite Manhattan brunch spot - at least the most frequented. After having a laugh as we always do with those two, Jesse asked me if I wanted to see a movie since we had no plans for the afternoon.

Me, see a movie?

Sometimes it's hard to get Jesse to go to the theater with me, especially since I go so often. My Letterboxd is telling me that I saw 40 films in the theaters last year. That's...a lot. I like going with Jesse because he is highly opinionated about films. Even when he's not with me I leave the theater wondering if it would be something Jesse would enjoy. I'm getting better at predicting his love/hate levels!

Anyway, I checked my phone and the new Williamsburg Cinema was playing Soderbergh's latest (and last?) feature film, Side Effects. Soderbergh can really go either way with me, and I wasn't sure if this was something that would be any good. I thought it might tread a little too political (for a movie starring Channing Tatum, if you know what I mean), but it ended up being something entirely different than what I expected. I really liked it, and Jesse did too!

That evening we went to a new restaurant in our neighborhood that had been getting good reviews and is up for a 'Best New Restaurant' award. It was delicious food! And had great cocktail to boot. It was a fitting ending to a great last weekend.

Analog time.

During these winter months, Jesse noticed that sometimes when we don't have a busy schedule we have a routine of being sucked into our electronics while sitting next to each other. He'll be playing a video game while I go through my RSS feeds on my computer. We are spending time together, but without any interaction. Jesse decided we should start having 'analog time' where we hang out without our electronics -- like playing card games. We've done this the past two days and it's been pretty great. We put on music and have conversations while I beat him in rummy (okay, we are tied currently). I even suggested we only listen to records as part of the 'analog' theme. Future analog fun may include cooking meals together (joke: we have a gas stove, not an electric one! second joke: us, cooking) and backgammon.

Today: tie-breaking our current Rummy 500 tournament and a screening of Lincoln afterwards. Finally.

In the mist of some sweet afternoon.

Last night I got home from work exhausted; I had even fallen asleep on the subway ride home, my book open in my lap as my head bobbed up and down. Jesse and I ordered arepas and tostones for dinner and then I sequestered myself in our room with Netflix and Pee Wee and chamomile tea.

Since I was sleepy, I wanted a light movie that I may not have to pay attention to completely. I chose Like Crazy, and I chose wrong for a light, romantic movie. After I was fully awaken by that movie, I delved into Take This Waltz. What's weird about these two movies is though entirely different, there were similar themes, or, maybe similar questions raised about relationships, love, 'soul mates,' and romantic decisions. Life decisions, really.

Like Crazy is about an American man and British woman falling in love during college in the United States. They are in love...like crazy. When her student visa runs out, Anna makes the mistake of staying in the U.S. an extra week with Jacob, effectively (and unknowingly to her until it's too late) banning her from re-entering the U.S. The movie is a heartbreaker--their lives must carry on and they have to figure out whether the long distance is worth it if their appeals to the embassy are never approved, if they can circumvent the ban by getting married, and what happens when they become attracted to other people. As someone who has been in long distance relationships, the emotions that come across felt realistic. The ending was ambiguous to a certain extent -- and it made me SAD. All caps sad. But I wonder if it's just me, personally, that is sad. Would someone else watch it and see hope and happiness? I wouldn't call myself a cynic, but when it comes to love and relationships, I'm a realist.

What I liked best about Like Crazy was how the story unfolded -- there was no dialogue or title cards that informed on their decisions or the passing of time. Instead, the movie would just show you. In one scene they're on the phone and she begs a question; you know his answer not because he says anything but because it cuts to him watching someone else leave with a box of things, and then he's on a plane. I enjoyed the way the director revealed these plot points, and how he trusted the audience to discern what had happened on their own.

After the movie was over, I went downstairs and explained everything to Jesse in a big huff and he looked kind of bewildered and then just laughed at me. I trudged upstairs for another movie.

Take This Waltz has been on a few people's top ten lists this year (or, rather, last year's?), and so I knew I had to watch it before I made my own (coming soon!). The film is about Margot, a Canadian woman who lives with her husband Lou, a guy making a cookbook of chicken recipes. Their marriage seems happy if somewhat strange in its cutesy--she speaks to him in a baby voice sometimes ("I wuv you") and sometimes they act like two children playing games in a fort at summer camp. It's the most twee relationship I've ever seen depicted. It was kind of gross.

In the midst of this, Margot meets their neighbor Daniel who flirts with her a whole lot, even though she says she will be faithful to her wonderful husband. She's still curious, though. Let's be honest: Daniel is really, really, ridiculously good looking. Coincidentally last night, Amber was also watching Take This Waltz in her own home and we started texting about the movie (almost as good as watching a movie with my bestie!), and at one point we were just sending emojis to each other about how "balls hot" this guy was. And also, water aerobics.

I digress. So Margot is like, man, my marriage is awesome and I love my husband, and we've been married five years but... Daniel is different. Everybody, I think, can understand that feeling. At least the 'what if?' scenario. I have to be say, I'm not sure this movie would work--that Margot would work with the audience as well as she does--if she was not played by Michelle Williams. Williams is a likable, adorable woman. If Margot was played by someone that audiences didn't like as much, I think she'd come off completely differently, and most audiences wouldn't like her or what she does or this movie, at all.

The ending of this movie made me think of the ending of Like Crazy. I thought it was pretty sad and negative and depressing. There were a couple of things that signified that to me, even though it could be taken as wholly a happy ending. It was written and directed by Sarah Polley, and I enjoyed the movie overall, and liked her focus on Margot and her complexities. There was one particular scene in a cafe (one that made me burst out laughing so that Jesse could hear down below) that seemed so clearly written by and intended for women... it's seductive and funny, and I thought about that scene later during the ending sequences. The two together, the before and after, make me wonder and question--always good when watching a movie.

After the end, though, I did burst out with, "Ugh, RELATIONSHIPS!" I think that's a good reaction to these films. Had these two ended in traditional rom-com fashion, I would not have liked them as much. Who needs to see another tightly sealed happy ending? These movies give much more to work with, since they attempt to ask the audience something about themselves, I think.

Has anybody else watched these movies? I tried not to spoil either of them, but I recommend them. And also feel free to tell me what you thought of the endings. Were they happy or sad? What did you think overall? I'd love to discuss in the comments!

I wander aimless, leering at strangers.

It's about that time again. Yes, we're a week and one day into my separation from Jesse, and no, the stagnant heated arms of the obliterating humidity aren't replacing Jesse's as I fall asleep. It happens this way. There's much to do, but my mind wanders like it sees a bright, shiny object to the west, and that would be my husband. So I drift into silences sometimes, staring out a window like I'm in a Sofia Coppola movie - pensive muteness, great soundtrack - and I think about him. We'll be together soon, but it's kind of one of those recurring and familiar feelings when he's gone away. It's not horrible, but I find myself sighing a lot.

The swell part is that he's there when I reach out for him - not physically, of course, but somewhere there. Invisible lines stretching until our voices or words connect. He's always there.