Why Ryan Adams and I would be BFFs.

Something wicked this way comes.

I finished my taxes! Yay! With my refund + the rebate, I think I'll have enough to pay for all or a large chunk of my wedding dress. (I said it!)

I felt really accomplished last night as I had done my taxes and paid the bills, but then I got so lethargic as I was trying to clean my room I just fell into bed.

I should backtrack re: this weekend.

On Friday, Erica, Jesse, and I met up with supreme Pug-owner couple Alana & Dimitry for dinner at Roberta's. Yum. The three of us bid adieu after the food and headed to downtown Brooklyn for a show by Jesse's friends in The Hard Lessons. After a long and arduous (no, really) train ride there, we saw one song, but it was great, and good to see them again.

On Saturday Jesse and I went to see Patrick Stewart as Macbeth on Broadway. I was surprised to take in a non-traditional production that was at times reminiscent of the WWII-Stalin era, but at other times entirely contemporary. The background of the stage would sometimes be filled with projected video or pictures, and the sound system helped set the eerie and horror-like mood of the play. Stewart was great; during the ovation he shed a tear as the audience all stood. Jesse and I agreed afterwards that while it was great, it may have been a little over-the-top in spots - the three witches (played by three nurses/maids in the play) turn a semi-musical rap from the famous "toil & trouble" lines of the play. However, I love Shakespeare and it's refreshing to see different takes on it.

After the play, Jesse and I were in Kelly's neighborhood so we grabbed a thai dinner with her. The food was delicious, and we had so much fun catching up with Kelly. Sometimes this city is so fast-paced it's hard to keep up with what everybody's doing if you can't sit down and talk every once in a while.

Saturday night was originally planned as a night out in Brooklyn - a party, some friends at a bar, etc. As soon as Jesse and I got home to Erica, we just didn't feel like leaving. Kelly came over and we drank some spirits and settled in for some Wii, as this was Kelly's first experience. Then Sean, James and Andrew came over somewhere around two am, and the poker started. We were up til six am. Ha.

The next afternoon when our grogginess wore, we all met up again for brunch and then it was TAX TIME. And BILLS TIME. Basically, being a grown-up.

All in all, it was a greatly epic weekend. It's Jesse's last for a while, as he leaves on Friday morning for tour, but I'm not dwelling on it. There's far too much going on to pause and be sad for the sake of being sad.

In random news, I'm taking in my annual reading of the Best American Magazine Writing. This morning on the commute, I read an article by Susan Casey called "Plastic Ocean." It's a scary read about pockets of plastic rubbish in the ocean. Depressing. Just sayin.

Also, LOL Lost. That is all.

Jesse's taking inventory.

All the sneakers Jesse owns. Except for his special Grammy ones...he forgot to put them in the line-up.

Off to brunch.

On this glorious Sunday morning. Er, afternoon. We kinda stayed up playing wii and poker til six am. Ha.

-- via hip brooklyn love top

Modern versh of Macbeth...

We're sitting in the Lyceum Theater for a first-showing preview of Macbeth starring Patrick Stewart. It opens in a couple of weeks.

Fun fact: Shakespeare invented the name Jessica.

Fun fact 2: Richard III is my favorite Shakespeare play.

-- via hip literal literary nerd top

Flying.

Dear Jessica,

Congrats, homegirl. I don't think I've been engaged before. Or married. I don't remember too far back. Pretty much two years is it. People just kind of remind me of things I did.

I should probably tell you right now that I'm not going to be at your wedding. You sent me something with a date and address and stuff, but I think I just lost it when Parker Posey and I were under a table in a diner making out. She said she needed me to be weirder or on crack or something. So I just chugged a lot of maple syrup and did that.

I'm sorry you didn't enjoy the rules-your-soul soundtrack of The Replacements. Dude. How could you not rock out to those classics??? Maybe you shouldn't be playing poker while it's on tv. It's a movie you should really pay attention to. Honestly.

That's all the pre-marriage advice I have for you. Tell Jesse killer job, bro.

Regards,

Keanu

In regards to Pretty. Odd.

I listened to the Panic album again on the way home. I've decided I really dig track nine, "Pas de Cheval." (I don't know what it means, and I don't want to google it.) Anyway, while I was listening to it, I was totally imagining The Oneders (or The Wonders, whatevs) from That Thing You Do! singing it. It makes me want to snap my fingers and twirl around in a big skirt.

I think that Beatles-esque rock is going to be coming out of all these emo and rock and pop bands in the near future. Not just because of Panic's latest effort, though. I mean, Adam Schlessinger of Fountains of Wayne who wrote the songs for The Wonders in the film also worked on Motion City Soundtrack's latest, which has all those lovely hand-claps and "oohs." The film Across the Universe brought the sixties and the Beatles to a younger generation late last year. And Schlessinger is working next with (drumroll please) Dashboard Confessional! This is just my theory on future sounds.

Also, you can buy Panic and MCS' latest together on Amazon.com today for a special price! At least that's what it said when I was checking the track name on Panic's page.

I do enjoy happy music.

Man it feels good to feel this way.

I got some great sleep last night, finally. Sorry for the groggy posting. It makes little sense even to me. I woke up this morning feeling ready for the day! You know what's a great way to start the day? With The Matches' song "Wake the Sun." Walking to the subway, I was totes smiling. And also, I'll admit it, I listened to the Panic at the Disco album today and I thoroughly enjoy it's Beatles-ness. I was smiling as I got off the subway listening to "Nine in the Afternoon." I was like in a '70s sitcom title sequence, but WHATEVER. Smile smile smile I'm happy shut up la la la music smile smile smile. <------- my usual disposition.

Moving on!

So in all the good cheer of the past couple of weeks, there have been some oddities. People who couldn't muster enough sincerity to sound genuine about their congrats, and a particular non-friend that I haven't talked to for years (complicated) sending me best wishes. Weird. So, after talks with my closest, I've decided to no longer entertain the "because I have to" well wishes or even quote-unquote friendship of the former. The latter remains un-replied to. It's too strange to consider at the moment. (Apologies for my cryptic writing here.)

I found this online and I think it's cute...and I don't know what they are or their actual size. I'll go with bowls.

Tonight I really should work on my taxes. But there's also a poker game afoot...(afoot, really?) I'm delighted to think about the promises of weekend relaxation.

And I'll end with a litte barftime...Reason #8392 I'm marrying him: he did all my laundry yesterday while I was at work. And I abhor doing laundry.

Exhausted.

After the fun night of conversation with the girls over drinks, I came home last night too tired to function much. However, I was pulled into Jesse's game of poker with Sean, James, and Adam. I ended up coming in second and got some cashish! But then I had to get up at seven am like every morning, and I'm lying in bed now unable to stop yawning. I did get my ring back this afternon! It looks as lovely as ever. I then attempted (and failed) to do my taxes and just sat glassy-eyed watching ANTM. So this post is all I can muster at the moment.

Drinks! Girls! Laughs!

-- via hip guest dj the pope top

Every step to the daylight keeps you stumbling on.

I came home and made a lovely sweet & sour mango stir-fry chicken with potatoes for the fianz. Now I'm heading out to meet the girls for drinks. Honestly, I'd be nothing without my best girlfriends. Make. My. Life.

Easter weekend.

My mom nearly fell over when she saw the ring.

Growing up, she always talked about my future wedding and husband. When my parents bought their house a couple of years ago, my mom said at the time that she specifically wanted the house because of it's huge backyard: for my wedding reception. I always scoffed at my mother's remarks; this is probably why she and my whole family thought I'd never want to get married. When I called to say Jesse had proposed, they all immediately asked (on speakerphone, of course): "What did you say??"

As someone who never thought of weddings or dresses or husbands or rings, it was surprisingly nice to go home with a diamond on my left hand and a fiancee. My mom, obvious from her reaction, loves the ring. She immediately called her family and best friends (again). My dad was also impressed, and when he picked us up from the train station, welcomed Jesse with a hearty hug and a "welcome to the family!"

My mother and I tend to bicker over a lot, though we love each other. I thought it would be nice to show up this weekend with a bunch of wedding magazines since she was so excited. I mean, this was probably a moment she thought would never happen. After satisfying her with my patience over her thoughts on my wedding, the family settled on the couch to watch Enchanted. Uh, I'd watched it the week before, but I really LOVE this movie (another great Rick rec!). It's like Sleeping Beauty + The Little Mermaid + 13 Going on 30. (Sidenote: I'm obvs mature enough for marriage when I list these awesome movies, right? Also, I say "obvs.") I digress. The movie is hilarious, and though I thought the songs strange during the Oscars, they're perfect in the movie.

On Saturday, it was time to get down to business. My parents gave Jesse and I a sit-down counseling talk about marriage. My parents have been together for twenty-six years, and are as happy as can be (one day I'll share their quite mythic story). It was full of well-wishes, stern but good advice, and left open-ended for future discussion. No matter my jokes here as I write, but I take marriage seriously, as does Jesse, and I know that I'm ready for this, and I'm ready for Forever.

The rest of Saturday included my Uncle Dave bringing over champagne to celebrate, an amazing turkey dinner via my father, Jesse and I cleaning up the kitchen to show off the domesticates we are, and lots of rummy with my brother. The next morning we went to church (something my mother informed Jesse he'd have to get used to) and then we set back off for New York. It was a truly fabulous weekend, and I couldn't be happier. My family means the world to me, as does their support.

Funny story about the train ride home - per my nature, I never wrote out my first name with anybody's last name. Not even Clooney! I told Jesse this was probably because while other girls were busy having marriage fantasies, I was having other kinds of, uh, fantasies (and we all know Clooney isn't the marrying type). I told Jesse that I'd have to get my checks changed next year. I'd have to get a new signature, too. So, in completely atypical fashion, I broke out my little notebook and a pen and started signing "Jessica Johnson," with such glee that I may have regressed into a sixth grader in that moment. I'm supremely excited, surprised by my traditional nature, and ecstatic because I hate the lowercase cursive "k" in Parker because it's not connected in my signature and Johnson flows quite well. The nerd flag always flies.

Bye bye.

For now. Had to give my ring back for resizing. Jesse guessed and was only half a size off! He took the only other ring I wear occassionally on my right hand's middle finger and came up with a near-perfect size. Dude's a genius.

But I miss my ring for reals. I actually never liked wearing rings. All evening I've been grasping for it.

-- via hip he's a regular sherlock holmes top

Heading home.

In Hartford, waiting for the train home. Great weekend.

-- via hip happy easter top

Great Friday.

Good news: I got out of work early and came home to shower (thus the reason for my blowdried poofy hair)! Me and the fiancee are now headed to Penn Station to be at my parents house for the holiday weekend. Apparently they're going to give us a talk about marriage.

Related & frequently asked question: Did Jesse ask my dad for my hand in marriage?

Answer: From Japan in February, Jesse hand-wrote my father a six-page letter. He bought nice paper, and even a nice pen. He anxiously awaited a reply for a week. When my dad did reply, he said, "If you can convince her, then welcome to the family."

If you can convince her...

Ha!

Wake the sun.

Last night was Jaime's birthday party - in a bar that has a pool. Or, a pool with a bar in it. And a DJ. And a steamroom. And a sauna. Um, the amount of fun had by people sipping/chugging drinks and dancing in a pool? Unlimited. Unfortch for me, the trains were running SO SLOW last night (I hate the F-V! Always!) that we didn't get home at a decent hour in order for me to shower properly post-chlorine sexy-party time. And I could not wake up this morning. So, if you're following here, I am currently sitting at work...smelling like chlorine. Sigh.

Oh, Jiscilla posted some pics from Tuesday night! I had my cell phone out because people wanted to see the ring in the darkened bar, so wala, light.

RANDOM RANDOM RANDOM

My dad sent me an e-mail todoay, and he used a sadface. The internets have gotten to my dad!

I still LOVE Dave Grohl. And I will continue to post his awesome quotes:

HARP: You’re a married man now with a beautiful two-year-old daughter. What do family values mean to you? The Republicans have perverted that phrase for their own cause while Hillary says it takes a village—

[cutting in] You know what it takes? It takes a barbecue. I think that what the country needs now is a good, smoky barbecue—family style, at least once a week, winter months included. Every Sunday.

Also, Ryan Adams ramblings set off constant grins. Today he even wrote about KEANU!

Jada and Will stay strong. Like a Minor Threat album that never stops. Like a double rainbow. I look to that bond with total hope for humanity. Also they both have major talent AND I mean, the stunts in I AM LEGEND and the MATRIX, that is not easy stuff. If you watch the extra “making-of” dvd that comes with the MATRIX you can see just how hard they worked to get into shape to walk up walls and do back-flips. Keanu, who is another of my favorites ( I mean after Constantine, gimme a break, they should have just stopped making movies for a while and took note….CLASSfuckingIC…. I wish they would do more movies in hollywood with Will Smith, Harry Connick Jr, and Bruce Willis…in like one move. that would be extreme. I would wait on line forever with Wendy my pink houseplant and we would see EVERY prequel which as you know, is such a thrill ride in itself these days what with modern cinema surround-sound and the smell of peoples jackets...

I really do love that Crazy Face. In related news, apparently Ryan has been dating Mandy Moore since December. Also, last night the DJ played a Ryan Adams song - uh, stoked are I!

I like freeze tag much better.

Okay. Lyndsey asked me to do this "meme." I assure you, I've never...evs have done a "meme" and I had to google "meme" to find out exactly what it is. I didn't really get a definition, just a bunch of - you guessed it - memes! This is my first, and probably last, attempt. I've never been an online survey type.

01 Link to the person who tagged you. LYNDSEY.
02 Post the rules. CHECK. (PS, THESE ARE THE RULES)
03 Share six non-important things / habits / quirks about yourself. BELOW.
04 Tag at least three people. ERICA (BC YOU WON'T BUT YOU NEED TO UPDATE SO HOPEFULLY YOU WILL), KELLS (SAME REASON), AND BECCA (YOU ARE GOOD AT SURPRISING ME WITH FACTS ABOUT YOURSELF)
05 Be sure the people you tagged KNOW you tagged them by commenting what you did. NO. YOU LURK ME AND FIND OUT. YOU. LURK. ME.

ONE I am a texture eater. Texture > taste.

TWO I enjoy The Rock. Yeah, that dude who used to wrestle. But I've never seen him wrestle. I just like him - I don't know why. Very Keanu-esque in my world.

THREE I have a weird-hand/arm-shaking thing I do when I'm nervous/excited/angry/etc. but I usually only do it behind peoples' backs. It's come out of the closet since meeting Jesse. But I was careful to keep it hidden...I'm a spaz.

FOUR In tenth grade, I was so into Kevin Spacey, my 15-year-old self decided I would go see Mr. Spacey in Eugene O'Neill's The Iceman Cometh on Broadway for my Spring Break (I lived in Kentucky at the time). That's all I wanted to do. And I did it. And I met him. I've been nerdy for life.

FIVE Many times when I'm watching tv, I will just say, "bang it out." At times, this is my only commentary. Whether it be reality, sitcom, drama, movie, or the Discovery Channel, I say it. Or scream it. Whatever.

SIX I never, ever thought about getting married. I never dreamed of a dress. I never gave thought to a ring, wedding, husband, etc. Now I'm obsessed with theknot.com. (And so is Jesse!)

If you'd like explanations, there is a comments section to inquire. I've been released from this meme curse.

Haha, funny story, no really...

I wake up every morning at seven am to get ready for work. I was walking down my stairs this morning a bit groggy, and I tripped on the last four stairs, bumping down the rest of the way to crumple into a ball at the bottom of them. Jesse came racing downstairs, of course. He inspected me, gave me a big hug, told me that I gave him "quite a fright." I have welts that will surely turn into bruises on both my arms, and the back of my leg; one of my toe nails is all cracked and broken and an ankle and wrist hurt a bit when I move them. I also have a dull pain on my lower back - another possible bruise.

Jesse gets to take my stair-battered self home to Mom and Dad this weekend!

"No really, Dad, I fell down the stairs..."

Mini-surprises abound.

My coworkers surprised me with a bottle of champagne and a card. Jesse surprised me with a lunch visit. Milkshakes!

-- via hip everything's pretty sweet right now top

Total Request Live still exists.

And Motion City Soundtrack's new video "It Had to Be You" is up for the antiquated countdown, so you should vote for it even if you don't watch the show. Even if it kills you. (Nerd alert, sigh.)

VOTE HERE NOW.

This post also allows me to re-publish my fave screencap from the video, yesssss:

ALSO!!! Yesterday, the Matches had a brand new album that came out, A BAND IN HOPE and you should buy it. Now. Immediately. It's great. And if you don't have their last album Decomposer, you should buy that TOO. And their new video for "Wake the Sun" can be seen here.

That is all.

I'm kit-kats about you people.

One day maybe I'll have Jesse tell his side, about his preparation, and how he pulled off the ultimate surprise, and then you'll all really be crying (ha).

Thank you for all the comments! Thank you to all those special blog posts congratulating Jesse & I! Seriously, that was awesome to go through my Google Reader and see all the shout outs. So I shall shout you out here:

Sarah (I'm so glad you like my disgusting blog) - Aileen (for being the only girl besides Beth that knew!!) - Beth (srsly, you people keep secrets well) - Becca (travel blog via SF) - Emily (I totally "aw"-d reading that) - Erica (vodka soda and mic coming your way) - Jiscilla (for officially confirming the news in the blogosphere haha) - and Jason (totally rad, totally dude-like congrats, see you in July) - oh and even the MCS boards had a congratulations thread :)

Other great reactions:

I called Steve (best exboyf ever who introduced me to Jesse) the night Jesse proposed and he goes, "I knew it! I called it! I feel like a girl right now, I just don't know what questions to ask you! Oh, and I'm singing at your wedding!"

Mark Hoppus IMing Jesse congratulations. HA.

From John on my MySpace comments: What, no AP. net thread yet? I need to get mah forum on!

---

Last night Jesse and I took my brother (who is visiting New York for the FIRST TIME) to Alligator Lounge with James, Jaime, and Jonah. Yeah, J's hang out with J's. And my brother's name is Travis. Whatever. Anyway, the great thing about Alligator Lounge is that you buy a beer and you get a free whole pizza to yourself. A free pizza per beer. Just sayin'. Travis - way into that.

Then we headed to Trainwreck Tuesday and I got to see a lot of friends who hadn't seen me since before I was engaged (eeee! still freaks me out to write it!). We had met at Rob Hitt's party PMC last January, so Jesse thanked him for making sure he was out that night. (Rob also posted a Trainwreck bulletin yesterday saying to come out for our "Happy Day" and linked this here blog - haha). I got to see a bunch of my favorite girlfriends, too. Everyone seemed genuinely happy for me, and it was a good feeling to show off my brother, fiancee, ring, etc. I'm rarely, if ever, craving to the be the center of attention. I'm just so awkward and klutzy for that. But I was too happy and proud last night to break into sweats. Yay!

Mission accomplished: my brother fully enjoyed New York, and plans to return soon.

As for me, I'm planning on finally doing absolutely nothing tonight. Just a bit of bad reality tv and couch cuddles. Aka bliss.

Heading out!

My brother and I. Jesse and I. :)
See ya ladel!

How he proposed.

Jesse was out of town last month during both Valentine's Day and our one year anniversary, so he planned a special weekend for just the two of us this past weekend. I got out of work early on Friday and headed to the nearby hotel to meet him. Our room was gorgeous; you don't really find spacious hotel rooms in Manhattan.

I had been long awaiting this weekend to relax with him, and was so excited I had bought a new dress and even painted my nails (which happens rarely). I got all glammed up and we decided to go to Satsko's for a glass of wine before dinner.

The evening turned into how it always has for us - continual conversation that never lulls or lacks. Jesse had made reservations at Lil Frankie's, a great Italian place that he had taken me to on our first date. We were seated at a secluded corner table in the dimly lit restaurant. It became nostalgic for me and our dinner fodder turned into reminiscing about meeting each other and our first date. He said something about how beautiful I was; how he never thought he'd be with somebody so - and I got all teary, because he said it with such sincere wistfulness in his voice.

While we ate and sipped our wine, we started talking about how confused I had been on our first date. At the time, he was recording an album and would be leaving New York in a month, which he brought up. I took this to mean that once that month was over, this new romance would be as well. Apparently, he was being sarcastic. I was confused, but later on our first date I mentioned how I had never really traveled or vacationed with a significant other, and he told me that I was "smart and pretty, and I'm sure you'll find somebody to travel with." Again, apparently joking - but after that, I was no longer confused, I was sure he just wanted to hang out for a month and be on his way. While remembering all this, Jesse recalled walking out of Lil Frankie's that night totally happy that he had essentially made clear he saw in me a girlfriend, and I walked out thinking here's a band dude who just wants to have a girl for a month. A few days later he erased any doubts I had.

On Friday night he reiterated how he didn't want me to be confused anymore. While we waited for dessert, he began to explain how happy he was. He asked me if I was happy - I told him I'd never known this brand of happy, it was so good. I reached for my wine, and he says, "Well, can I ask you one more question." I'm sipping and not even looking at him, and I just nod. And then he holds my free hand and gets down on his knee and my other hand goes to my mouth and I go into some sort of shock when I realize what he's doing.

"Will you be with me forever?" he says, "Will you marry me, please?"

I'm crying. Nodding. Saying yes. He's nervous (note the "please," apparently not part of his original plan, ha).

He doesn't hear me say yes - perhaps the hand covering my mouth? My sobs? My mind trying to function given the complete and utter surprise of the moment??

He says, "I have a ring!"

He had been holding the ring in his other hand, but it was underneath the table and I couldn't see it.

"I said yes! A million times yes!"

And then I saw the ring and it was perfect. Of course. (When Kelly saw it the next day she concurred how marvelously "Me" it was.) As he slipped the ring onto my finger I was definitely shaking in happiness. We hugged each other tightly for a few minutes. I think I may have said something like, "Me? Really?"

When we finally paid attention to where we were, we realized that our dessert had been served, along with two glasses of champagne. On our way out (and to the hotel to call everybody), a few employees of Lil Frankie's congratulated us, and one of them commented that we were the first Lil Frankie's engagement.

He always makes sure it's special; and that's just one of the millions of reasons I said yes.

Be patient.

So many comments wanting to hear more! It's coming. I'll tide you over with a picture of the ring. The center diamond is Jesse's grandmother's. It's over 100 years old. Jesse got the rest of the ring handmade - it's exactly my style; modern and vintage. I was completely shocked because he didn't even ask me my ring size, my style, or anything. I love things that are intricate and vintage-looking. It's new, but it looks like it could have been straight out of the 1930s. And the main diamond, like I mentioned, is from the 1800s. Even without asking me any questions, he gave me the most perfect ring I didn't even know I wanted. I'm in love with it. It looks pretty as I type...it looks pretty all the time! Don't you think?

Oh hey, tomorrow's Tuesday...

It's hard to believe all that has happened this weekend, but I will post how he did it (that's the #1 question, eep) and more about all the fun stuff we did on the best. weekend. ever. (& THANK YOU for all the well wishes - seriously!!)

But tomorrow's Tuesday! And Dagger's got her party! And if you're 21+ you have to RSVP on going.com !

Let's get down on the dancefloor! My brother's in town today too! It's going to be a killer time, and you shouldn't miss it.

Yesterday!

-- via hip isn't it romantic top

Best Reactions 004

-----Original Message-----
From: kelly
To: Jiscilla, Jessica
CC: Erica, christy
Subject: Re: Fw: das ring
Date: Sat, 15 Mar 2008 13:47:30 +0000

Sidenote... Guess what we are going to plan? Yes, a "wedding rom com"
movie marathon!! Deal with it!! Xoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxox

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Best Reactions 003

-----Original Message-----
From: Erica
To: Jessica
CC: kelly, christy, jiscilla
Subject: Re: Fw: das ring
Date: Fri, 14 Mar 2008 23:02:19 -0400

HOLY FUCK.

ps: i just signed your ass up for the TheKnot.com. SHUT IT PARKER!

Best Reactions 002

Best Reactions 001

Jesse tells the story to the girls ystrdy.

-- via hip a table of teary eyes top

Erica couldn't contain herself.

Met up with the girls for a mini-celebrate sesh, and Erica was Miss Tears McGee. I love that girl! I love all my friends! I love everything right now. Ahhhh!!

-- via hip she's designing our invites top

So something big happened last night...

Big in a lot of ways.
I said yes.

Our digs for the weekend.